Monday, December 24, 2007
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Sad state in the Spears camp.
What the heck is going on with the Spears family?
The 16 year old is pregnant now? Brit Brit still doesn't have her kids.....
I have nothing left to say
The 16 year old is pregnant now? Brit Brit still doesn't have her kids.....
I have nothing left to say
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Pouting
My husband wants to cancel our holiday soiree scheduled for this Saturday night due to the snow covered streets. People will have trouble parking at our little dead end street. He is right about tough parking but I think it is worth the trouble as our parties are always fun. We are going to discuss it later and see if we can formulate a solution.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Ahh Monday
I love it when my Monday's start at 1:02 am and subsequently 4 things break at work all at once. It is so much more interesting than just one. Well anywho thanks to the internet Gnomes that love to ruin my life time to time I missed my am workout, oh and I ate a cheesburger sub yesterday. I can literally feel myself getting fatter....
Weekly Rundown
Husband Sick with the flu, counting the days until I catch dreaded sniffle disease.
I need to finish Xmas Shopping on Wednesday evening at the new "Natick Collection"...barely started.
Party with 30+ people scheduled for this coming Saturday night. Food\Alcohol yet to be purchased and house only half organized.
**Current Manic Thought***Not quite sure what I am going to do about the mountains of snow that have collected on my streets. I am considering purchasing sleds for guests so I can shush them to an from their cars. There won't be any close parking near my house and the parking lot down the street, yep town decided to cut back and not plow it. Royally screwed.
Weekly Rundown
Husband Sick with the flu, counting the days until I catch dreaded sniffle disease.
I need to finish Xmas Shopping on Wednesday evening at the new "Natick Collection"...barely started.
Party with 30+ people scheduled for this coming Saturday night. Food\Alcohol yet to be purchased and house only half organized.
**Current Manic Thought***Not quite sure what I am going to do about the mountains of snow that have collected on my streets. I am considering purchasing sleds for guests so I can shush them to an from their cars. There won't be any close parking near my house and the parking lot down the street, yep town decided to cut back and not plow it. Royally screwed.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Holiday Song Help
I am hosting a holiday soiree and I need some input. Please Please Please....
Any and all Holiday CD's Compilations, favorite artists. I want to have some mood music flowing from my iPod. Hit me up with your recommendations.
Any and all Holiday CD's Compilations, favorite artists. I want to have some mood music flowing from my iPod. Hit me up with your recommendations.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Ode to a Starbucks Peppermint Mocha...
Well this would be an ode if I were in the least bit poetic but sadly that is not the case. I will just say in the delicate words of one of my girlfriend's it is like a hot Christmas orgasm. I was going to go with Divine or even a basic yummy but I think her description conjures up a much more vivid impression for you lovely readers, don't you think? It also prevented me from using the word "Delish"that is in far too high a rotation on the Dunkin' Donuts Rachel Ray commercial for the holidays this year. For some reason her mannerisms and and voice in that commercial make me feel squirmy in a stepford wife\body snatcher sort of way...shudder...
Go out and get yourself a hot Christmas orgasm while supplies last, I promise you will not be disappointed. And if you are I hear the Vanilla Spice coffee and gingerbread donuts RR is hocking for dunks are delish :)
Go out and get yourself a hot Christmas orgasm while supplies last, I promise you will not be disappointed. And if you are I hear the Vanilla Spice coffee and gingerbread donuts RR is hocking for dunks are delish :)
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Pearly White
As a fairly new "newlywed" I am discovering some startling behaviors demonstrated by my new husband. This is a bit disheartening considering we lived in sin "4-EVA" I know HELL, Fire, brimstone, Hades....etc. I think I covered it in confession the night before my nuptials. Moving on...
Take the other day for instance. My husband rang me to announce that he had viewed some online wedding pics and does not like the shade of his teeth. Hmm, maybe just maybe the cigars, daily diet soda consumption and incessant coffee drinking (damm you Keurig ) may be contributing factors. I was just saying. ...He tells me he wants to have his teeth whitened. Being the helpful wife I am I suggested he try out Crest White strips before heading over to a Bright Smile Center. I offered also to pick them up during my bi-weekly CVS run that night(also known as how to spend\waste $75 on cosmetics and beauty products). I bring the strips home and he decides to try them out after dinner. I am lying peacefully on our sectional reading my book, dog nestled on my feet and I hear CRUNCH-CRINKLE-CRUNCH coming from the other half of the couch punctuated with "WTF is up with these damm things". I look over to see my brilliant husband attempting to shove the white strip into his mouth plastic backing and all!! So much for directions, better yet so much for common sense. I burst out laughing and asked what the heck are you doing?!? This only exacerbated his frustration and he actually spouted "I TOLD YOU I am trying to WHITEN MY TEETH" Wow, call me kooky because from where I was sitting he looked more like a three year old jamming a plastic toy into his mouth and being wholly unsuccessful. I calmly explained how he needed to remove the strip from the backing first. He let out an exacerbated sigh as if this whole cluster was somehow my fault, peeled the strip and quickly shoved it in back in his mouth.....THE WRONG WAY. Picture the pinched face of someone who just bit into a lemon with far more drool. I innocently said he should slow down and pay a little more attention, he wasn't seeing the humor in that statement (much less the logic). Eventually a few minutes later he attempted again with a new strip. I bet the makers of crest white strips never imagined the amount effort and strife when designing their easy for 99% of the population product, not including husbands who are rushing and not paying attention because god forbid they remove their eyes from the plasma TV for the 45 seconds it takes to apply logic to movement. I think that run on sentence should be a warning label on the box or maybe a shout out to all other wives with foolish husbands.
Take the other day for instance. My husband rang me to announce that he had viewed some online wedding pics and does not like the shade of his teeth. Hmm, maybe just maybe the cigars, daily diet soda consumption and incessant coffee drinking (damm you Keurig ) may be contributing factors. I was just saying. ...He tells me he wants to have his teeth whitened. Being the helpful wife I am I suggested he try out Crest White strips before heading over to a Bright Smile Center. I offered also to pick them up during my bi-weekly CVS run that night(also known as how to spend\waste $75 on cosmetics and beauty products). I bring the strips home and he decides to try them out after dinner. I am lying peacefully on our sectional reading my book, dog nestled on my feet and I hear CRUNCH-CRINKLE-CRUNCH coming from the other half of the couch punctuated with "WTF is up with these damm things". I look over to see my brilliant husband attempting to shove the white strip into his mouth plastic backing and all!! So much for directions, better yet so much for common sense. I burst out laughing and asked what the heck are you doing?!? This only exacerbated his frustration and he actually spouted "I TOLD YOU I am trying to WHITEN MY TEETH" Wow, call me kooky because from where I was sitting he looked more like a three year old jamming a plastic toy into his mouth and being wholly unsuccessful. I calmly explained how he needed to remove the strip from the backing first. He let out an exacerbated sigh as if this whole cluster was somehow my fault, peeled the strip and quickly shoved it in back in his mouth.....THE WRONG WAY. Picture the pinched face of someone who just bit into a lemon with far more drool. I innocently said he should slow down and pay a little more attention, he wasn't seeing the humor in that statement (much less the logic). Eventually a few minutes later he attempted again with a new strip. I bet the makers of crest white strips never imagined the amount effort and strife when designing their easy for 99% of the population product, not including husbands who are rushing and not paying attention because god forbid they remove their eyes from the plasma TV for the 45 seconds it takes to apply logic to movement. I think that run on sentence should be a warning label on the box or maybe a shout out to all other wives with foolish husbands.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Ok so I know I said no football talk
But what about those Patriots last night!!! Holy bejesus!!
I am the equivalent of what would be considered a Red Sox "Pink Hat" fan. I support the Boston teams whole heatedly in years such as this. The Red Sox, The Patriots and The Celtics are all dominant and I dig that I can relish in my own snobbery being from Boston and jump on the band wagon. On the years that they are all sinking faster then the titanic or are just running in the middle of the pack I then move on to more interesting TV pursuits and topics such as Heros, American Idol and Gossip websites.
Anyway as I was saying...how about them Patriots.
I am the equivalent of what would be considered a Red Sox "Pink Hat" fan. I support the Boston teams whole heatedly in years such as this. The Red Sox, The Patriots and The Celtics are all dominant and I dig that I can relish in my own snobbery being from Boston and jump on the band wagon. On the years that they are all sinking faster then the titanic or are just running in the middle of the pack I then move on to more interesting TV pursuits and topics such as Heros, American Idol and Gossip websites.
Anyway as I was saying...how about them Patriots.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Welcome - Disclaimer
I pondered momentarily when naming this site the number of visitors I would get looking for either porn or football musings, as neither of which will be found here. Sorry to disappoint....
The Naked Bootleg came about from a phrase my husband and his friends use when disentangling themselves from situations they no longer find enjoyable. For example: A bar outing with friends turned all day drinkfest where a quick getaway is in order to save further liver damage, here enters the naked bootleg. One heads towards the loo, car keys having been removed from pocket in a natural sweeping motion and are already jangling in hand discreetly out of sight of course. A quick bob then a weave (sometimes a twirl) and within minutes you are out the door safely inside your four wheeled chariot headed home with not a soul the wiser. The angry voice mails to your cell come later and confrontation is always easier when nestled safely inside the walls your own home (so is faked quick onset illness). I never said this behavior was polite but nonetheless I have seen it successfully employed on several occasions.
The actual Wikipedia definition of a naked bootleg is as follows:
In American football, a bootleg play is a play in which the quarterback runs with the ball in the direction of either sideline behind the line of scrimmage. This can be accompanied by a play action, or false hand off of the ball to a running back running the opposite direction. This is similar to the way bootleggers would hide whiskey in their trousers during Prohibition
Now on to my definition. This blog will be used as my mind's naked bootleg from everyday life. Sometimes my head becomes so full of information that I feel I might explode, albeit much is it useless musings but that is neither here nor there. I have used blogging for years as a quick departure from mundane tasks to offer commentary and fodder for the masses, or at least for myself and a small few who have stumbled upon my ramblings. This will be yet another attempt. I cannot promise profound intellectual content or remarkable insight but you just may find a few laughs tossed in between my daily schemes and chronicles.
The Naked Bootleg came about from a phrase my husband and his friends use when disentangling themselves from situations they no longer find enjoyable. For example: A bar outing with friends turned all day drinkfest where a quick getaway is in order to save further liver damage, here enters the naked bootleg. One heads towards the loo, car keys having been removed from pocket in a natural sweeping motion and are already jangling in hand discreetly out of sight of course. A quick bob then a weave (sometimes a twirl) and within minutes you are out the door safely inside your four wheeled chariot headed home with not a soul the wiser. The angry voice mails to your cell come later and confrontation is always easier when nestled safely inside the walls your own home (so is faked quick onset illness). I never said this behavior was polite but nonetheless I have seen it successfully employed on several occasions.
The actual Wikipedia definition of a naked bootleg is as follows:
In American football, a bootleg play is a play in which the quarterback runs with the ball in the direction of either sideline behind the line of scrimmage. This can be accompanied by a play action, or false hand off of the ball to a running back running the opposite direction. This is similar to the way bootleggers would hide whiskey in their trousers during Prohibition
Now on to my definition. This blog will be used as my mind's naked bootleg from everyday life. Sometimes my head becomes so full of information that I feel I might explode, albeit much is it useless musings but that is neither here nor there. I have used blogging for years as a quick departure from mundane tasks to offer commentary and fodder for the masses, or at least for myself and a small few who have stumbled upon my ramblings. This will be yet another attempt. I cannot promise profound intellectual content or remarkable insight but you just may find a few laughs tossed in between my daily schemes and chronicles.
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